A year-long worry

I haven't posted for ages.  I wanted to post with good news but the crappy (not bad, but just really annoying and worrying news) keeps on coming.

Firstly, can I say that I KNOW I am lucky.  I have survived up to now, I have my life a bit more back on track etc.  I'd like to say and nasty cancer nightmares are behind me, I've got used to my ugly chest and I worry less.  But guess what?  I can't.

The horrible biopsy was rien grave, yes.  I had my what is now annual check-up in July.  I had a mammo and the operator was very neutral, which worried me no end (been there before, that had a bad ending...)  She said, by precaution, I should have an ultrasound - don't like the sound of that 'by precaution either - and I couldn't have an appointment for two flippin weeks.  So I worried hard for two weeks.

I had the ultrasound in the morning and an oncologist appointment in the afternoon (with the nice, caring, listening oncologist).  I waited over 2 hours for my appointment and was only just in time for the hospital.  The appointment was a fucking farce.  I had told the receptionist that I had an appointment in the afternoon and I would need the results, and I did that because I'd phoned a couple of days earlier to check the results would be ready in time on the day. The ultrasound operator wasn't aware that I'd had a biopsy under MRI, she evidently hadn't read my notes at all.  I told her I had an appointment with the oncologist in the afternoon and she huffed and puffed and said 'why didn't you tell me?'  I said I told the receptionist, she yelled over to the receptionist and she said 'no I didn't know' - fucking liar.   When I was checking out, I asked for my previous scans, mri, results that I'd brought with me.  They couldn't find them.  And then the receptionist found them under her desk.  She also tried to charge me for the appointment, which happens every time, and I have to insist that I'm covered 100%, and she always backs down and says 'I can't see that on your Carte Vitale'.

I waited another 2 hours to see the oncologist. She had an emergency.  I understood.  She took one look at my results and said 'why didn't you give your MRI to the ultrasound operator, she says they weren't available'.  She lied.  So the oncologist kind of lost it and said - it was a waste of time you need to have another ultrasound somewhere else, these people are crap.

So I was back to where I'd started from with much time lost.