http://blog.thebreastcancersite.com/baringtheirscars/?utm_source=social&utm_medium=bcaware&utm_campaign=baringtheirscars&utm_term=20141127
Here's a moving short film about 3 breast cancer survivors who had to made different difficult decisions about reconstruction - a subject pretty close to my heart as January (one year after radiation and appointment with surgeon) approaches.
I was a bit disappointed to see that the woman who'd chosen a reconstruction seemed very sad but she did have implants so maybe that's much more 'artificial'. However, what is natural about having part of your body chopped off and replaced I ask myself!
Friday 28 November 2014
Sunday 16 November 2014
Understanding Breast Cancer and Managing Fears
Here's a useful and clear website that will help you understand a bit about what's going on if you are newly diagnosed as having breast cancer.
http://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/understand_bc?gclid=CNjswvPo8sECFafHtAodqTEA4g
This paragraph under 'Fears about Breast Cancer' particularly spoke to me. I sometimes feel like a right wuss with all the fears and stress going around in my head but this made me feel a bit less of a wuss:-
"The fear of breast cancer is unlike any other — psychologists and other experts agree on that. The fear can take many different forms, depending upon where you are in the breast cancer experience. Understand that many of your fears are shared by others. While fears are normal, they are uncomfortable to live with."
It really is a very useful resource for those who are family, friends, newly diagnosed (esp '10 ways to manage fear after diagnosis' - wish I'd read that last summer) or coping with the aftermath.
http://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/understand_bc?gclid=CNjswvPo8sECFafHtAodqTEA4g
This paragraph under 'Fears about Breast Cancer' particularly spoke to me. I sometimes feel like a right wuss with all the fears and stress going around in my head but this made me feel a bit less of a wuss:-
"The fear of breast cancer is unlike any other — psychologists and other experts agree on that. The fear can take many different forms, depending upon where you are in the breast cancer experience. Understand that many of your fears are shared by others. While fears are normal, they are uncomfortable to live with."
It really is a very useful resource for those who are family, friends, newly diagnosed (esp '10 ways to manage fear after diagnosis' - wish I'd read that last summer) or coping with the aftermath.
Saturday 8 November 2014
Appointment with Oncologist
So I spent 3 hours in the hospital today. I had an appointment at 11h30 and saw the doctor nearly 2 hours later. To be fair, she did apologise and explain that she had to fit in two newly diagnosed patients and all their family. And I knew she'd be late in any case, she always is, so I brought a book.
In the end I got talking to two other women in the waiting room who, it turned out, had also had breast cancer. They were 5 and 6 years on in their story. It was nice to exchange with them and swop stories and experiences. And it made the time go faster too! Apparently I'll have 6 monthly mammograms and appointments for 5 years then it will be yearly. You can learn something from everybody you talk to, I think.
I made a list of what I wanted to discuss with the oncologist, which helped, as my brain turns to mush once I'm in front of the doctor. I forgot to mention the leg cramps that frequently wake me up in so much pain though.
I also forgot the results of my last mammogram, which wasn't very clever of me, so I have to fax those on Monday.
I did, however, do the pre appointment blood test. I am short of vitamin D, calcium, and my cholesteral is slightly high. Otherwise there are no cancer markers. That was a huge relief.
The thing that concerned the doctor most was my dizzy spells, fast beating heart, chest pains and wooshing in my head. She sent me off to the nurses' station upstairs where they took my blood pressure with a fancy machine. It was quite high. So I now need to see a cardiologist. I sort of knew this would need further investigation and this was part of the reason I'd delayed seeing the oncologist or taking the MRI that my doctor had ordered me to do. If it takes virtually all my Saturday for a simple oncology appointment how on earth am I going to fit in a cardiologist and all those related examinations when I'm working? I feel like I've just got my life going again and this problem is a real pain. I'm also wondering what the heck this is going to lead to?
Inevitably, my lifestyle and weight will be criticised, horrified noises will be made and changes will have to come. Pfffff. Anyway, it's good that she gave a damn and is willing to help me feel better. She claims the problem is nothing to do with the tamoxifen or the menopause. I'm not convinced, I've seen on the internet lots of women who have the same symptoms with tamoxifen and the menopause and this wasn't a problem at all until I had cancer. We'll see what happens.
As far as the cancer goes, she was happy with my general state of health, gave me a good examination. I mentioned the subject of reconstruction and that the surgeon had advised me to raise the subject with her. She said yes, he can inject fat into the breasts, that would be best for you and you'll lose weight off your abdomen too. I didn't mention that this was his preferred method of 'reconstructing' so it's good that she has the same idea and is positive about it. She confirmed that it will have to go through the Commission but sees no reason why it should not be approved. But I don't have to do it if I don't want to, she also mentioned.
She also reminded me that I should take advantage of the Post Cancer Cure and said it would be good to go in February. This is something I hadn't thought about. Or maybe Easter. I'll see what I can do.
I have a mammogram to do in March with a blood test too. I have a prescription for Vitamin D capsules, calcium tablets, tablets for high blood pressure and tamoxifen. I mentioned that I've gone from barely having an aspirin to taking a tonne of stuff. This bugs me somewhat but I sort of look upon Tamoxifen as a kind of life insurance (if it's doing what it should be doing).
It was a funny appointment in some ways. I mentioned that I'd taken up yoga once a week and she was really interested and said at the end, she wanted to do it herself so would I mind if she joined the class! Also we talked about meditation and it turns out she was really into Transcendental Meditation (which I practised for a long time and still do sporadically) so we swopped stories. She said 'oh we have a lot in common'! I like her.
In the end I got talking to two other women in the waiting room who, it turned out, had also had breast cancer. They were 5 and 6 years on in their story. It was nice to exchange with them and swop stories and experiences. And it made the time go faster too! Apparently I'll have 6 monthly mammograms and appointments for 5 years then it will be yearly. You can learn something from everybody you talk to, I think.
I made a list of what I wanted to discuss with the oncologist, which helped, as my brain turns to mush once I'm in front of the doctor. I forgot to mention the leg cramps that frequently wake me up in so much pain though.
I also forgot the results of my last mammogram, which wasn't very clever of me, so I have to fax those on Monday.
I did, however, do the pre appointment blood test. I am short of vitamin D, calcium, and my cholesteral is slightly high. Otherwise there are no cancer markers. That was a huge relief.
The thing that concerned the doctor most was my dizzy spells, fast beating heart, chest pains and wooshing in my head. She sent me off to the nurses' station upstairs where they took my blood pressure with a fancy machine. It was quite high. So I now need to see a cardiologist. I sort of knew this would need further investigation and this was part of the reason I'd delayed seeing the oncologist or taking the MRI that my doctor had ordered me to do. If it takes virtually all my Saturday for a simple oncology appointment how on earth am I going to fit in a cardiologist and all those related examinations when I'm working? I feel like I've just got my life going again and this problem is a real pain. I'm also wondering what the heck this is going to lead to?
Inevitably, my lifestyle and weight will be criticised, horrified noises will be made and changes will have to come. Pfffff. Anyway, it's good that she gave a damn and is willing to help me feel better. She claims the problem is nothing to do with the tamoxifen or the menopause. I'm not convinced, I've seen on the internet lots of women who have the same symptoms with tamoxifen and the menopause and this wasn't a problem at all until I had cancer. We'll see what happens.
As far as the cancer goes, she was happy with my general state of health, gave me a good examination. I mentioned the subject of reconstruction and that the surgeon had advised me to raise the subject with her. She said yes, he can inject fat into the breasts, that would be best for you and you'll lose weight off your abdomen too. I didn't mention that this was his preferred method of 'reconstructing' so it's good that she has the same idea and is positive about it. She confirmed that it will have to go through the Commission but sees no reason why it should not be approved. But I don't have to do it if I don't want to, she also mentioned.
She also reminded me that I should take advantage of the Post Cancer Cure and said it would be good to go in February. This is something I hadn't thought about. Or maybe Easter. I'll see what I can do.
I have a mammogram to do in March with a blood test too. I have a prescription for Vitamin D capsules, calcium tablets, tablets for high blood pressure and tamoxifen. I mentioned that I've gone from barely having an aspirin to taking a tonne of stuff. This bugs me somewhat but I sort of look upon Tamoxifen as a kind of life insurance (if it's doing what it should be doing).
It was a funny appointment in some ways. I mentioned that I'd taken up yoga once a week and she was really interested and said at the end, she wanted to do it herself so would I mind if she joined the class! Also we talked about meditation and it turns out she was really into Transcendental Meditation (which I practised for a long time and still do sporadically) so we swopped stories. She said 'oh we have a lot in common'! I like her.
Friday 7 November 2014
Appointment with oncologist, giving blood
Ok so I finally made the appointment after some compassionate chiding from various friends and kind offers to come with me or make the appointment on my behalf (thank you dear friends, you just keep on caring, I am so grateful).
Also, the dizzy spells, pounding heart, indigestion, chest pains and tiredness are back, so I'm feeling a bit scared about all of that. I got an appointment much more quickly than I expected, they were ready to see me the next day but I took a meeting on Saturday as it fits in with my work. I have to brave the lab tomorrow morning for a blood test which will measure all sorts of things (I looked it all up on the internet from the prescription), some of the things they will be looking for is cancer markers and markers for metastasis. Great. Feeling worried, actually. What if they find something and I'm plunged back into that world? Try to remain optimist Claire.
Also, the dizzy spells, pounding heart, indigestion, chest pains and tiredness are back, so I'm feeling a bit scared about all of that. I got an appointment much more quickly than I expected, they were ready to see me the next day but I took a meeting on Saturday as it fits in with my work. I have to brave the lab tomorrow morning for a blood test which will measure all sorts of things (I looked it all up on the internet from the prescription), some of the things they will be looking for is cancer markers and markers for metastasis. Great. Feeling worried, actually. What if they find something and I'm plunged back into that world? Try to remain optimist Claire.
Faces of Breast Cancer
J Lo sent me the link to these stories. I find them comforting and upsetting to read in equal measures. I do think, however, that it's important for people to be able to share their story and feel part of a swell of women who have all been through the same thing. When I scroll down and see all the faces, bald heads, smiles and courage, it brings a lump to my throat without even having to read the stories.
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/projects/breast-cancer-stories?smid=fb-nytimes&smtyp=cur&bicmp=AD&bicmlukp=WT.mc_id&bicmst=1409232722000&bicmet=1419773522000
Go ahead, read some!
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/projects/breast-cancer-stories?smid=fb-nytimes&smtyp=cur&bicmp=AD&bicmlukp=WT.mc_id&bicmst=1409232722000&bicmet=1419773522000
Go ahead, read some!
Monday 3 November 2014
Rethinking our breasts
Another TED talk, this one by a beauty queen who had a preventative double mastectomy.
I'm not sure that she suceeded in her mission to rethink our breasts, but her story is a powerful one. When I told my eldest son that I had breast cancer, he mentioned Angelina Jolie, didnt she have cancer Mummy? Well no, not exactly, but it goes to show how broad the influence of her similar decision was. I think she was brave to be honest about it. As to her decision, well, it was her personal décision. I sometimes think that I am glad that they reduced my 'good' breast so much, so that maybe I have less chance of getting cancer in that one.
Anyway, here's the talk.
http://blog.thebreastcancersite.com/rose/
I'm not sure that she suceeded in her mission to rethink our breasts, but her story is a powerful one. When I told my eldest son that I had breast cancer, he mentioned Angelina Jolie, didnt she have cancer Mummy? Well no, not exactly, but it goes to show how broad the influence of her similar decision was. I think she was brave to be honest about it. As to her decision, well, it was her personal décision. I sometimes think that I am glad that they reduced my 'good' breast so much, so that maybe I have less chance of getting cancer in that one.
Anyway, here's the talk.
http://blog.thebreastcancersite.com/rose/
Sunday 2 November 2014
Yes, I survived cancer. But that doesn't define me
http://www.ted.com/talks/debra_jarvis_yes_i_survived_cancer_but_that_doesn_t_define_me#t-1991
This is a great TED talk by Debra Jarvis about her experience with the trauma of breast cancer.
The gist of the talk is that we don't have to take on being a cancer survivor and make it define us. We can define ourselves otherwise. It's a choice.
"Yes, I survived cancer but that doesn't define me."
"Claim your experience but don't let it claim you."
Very thought provoking, definitely worth spending 16 minutes of your life listening to her.
Tell me, what 3 things define you?
This is a great TED talk by Debra Jarvis about her experience with the trauma of breast cancer.
The gist of the talk is that we don't have to take on being a cancer survivor and make it define us. We can define ourselves otherwise. It's a choice.
"Yes, I survived cancer but that doesn't define me."
"Claim your experience but don't let it claim you."
Very thought provoking, definitely worth spending 16 minutes of your life listening to her.
Tell me, what 3 things define you?
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